Weirdness of the Week - Another Opportunity to Practice Quick Transitions

I would not say making transitions is one of my natural strengths, but I'm working on it.  In this life I lead at the moment, I am being presented with constant opportunities to practice making these transitions more skillfully and smoothly.

I have only worked at my new job as a receptionist at the yoga studio for about a month... when they tell me today that they've hired a new girl who also teaches yoga and is a raw chef.  She arrives from Canada this week and my last day will be Friday.  I was just getting used to everything and I really like the girls who work there.  It's crazy how one day you don't have a job... the next day you do.  Then, one day you don't.  I know I've talked about this same thing many times, but it still amazes me.

Then, when I got home... I checked my email.  The director of the HS had emailed the English teachers to tell us that she didn't need us to come anymore.  So, I guess today was my last day at the HS.  Talk about a lack of closure.... I didn't even know it was my last day.  How fitting, though.  If I think about it, it really shouldn't be surprising.  It goes along with all of the other random endings I have experienced.

I guess since I'm not of this culture and never fully will be, I'll make my own form of closure - in the form of a reflection.  One of my really sweet students at the HS came today - of her own will - to finish watching the movie, Divergent.  After class she says, "Teacher.  Photo."  Then, we hug and she asks me "Teacher, will you return the other year? I hope so."  :]  I'd say this was a good last day.  I'll take that as closure.

And... through all of this practice, I am getting better at trusting myself and trusting the universe to support me in whatever adventure that is presented next.

Because, even though many branches have felt like they were breaking under me, I have always been able to fly. Besides, if I'd had stayed on one tree all the time, I'd never have experienced all of this beauty. 

Weirdness of the Week - Dogs and the Ropa Americana

Walking home from the high school, I see a lot of things.  I guess for that matter, walking anywhere I see a lot of things. 

Yesterday there was a dog laying in the middle of a major road as if it was in its bed.  It had no concern of being run over.  The most unusual part, though, was that I stood there and watched at least ten cars drive by.  Each one of them calmly drove around the dog.  Only the ninth car beeped, to which the dog had no reply. 

You can also see the scary homeless guy in the background - he's the only one who scares me.

Then, later in the day, I was on the bus when a woman and her kids got on.  Apparently, their dog would have also liked to come.  She started telling it to go home as she climbed the stairs of the bus.  It didn't leave.  Then, she proceeded to yell out the window that the dog needed to go home.  It is still odd to me that dogs have the independence to go wherever they want during the day.  I've always had this image in my head of dogs getting together and going to the beach, returning to their houses for dinner. 

Another funny occurrence on the bus yesterday was that a woman was wearing a UofA t-shirt.  I'm sure that she bought it at the Ropa Americana - a second hand clothing store that comes from donations out of the US, I believe.  Anyway, I decided to tell her that her shirt was from my university.  I mean, if I had a shirt from someone's university, I'd think it was cool if they told me.  I don't think she seemed that excited, but who knows.... maybe it was the story of the day when she ate dinner with her family that night. 

My sketchy spy picture of the lady in the UA shirt.... and my banana

Maybe culmination isn't a thing here...

As I was walking home from the high school today, I realized something; maybe culmination isn't a thing here.  I mean, first - there was no performance of my theatre group in Cocal.  Now, I don't think that my improv troupe will perform because the theatre keeps taking our dates and renting them out to paying shows.

But that's not all...

There's also not really a sense of culmination in the school system.  At least not the way I'm used to. 
The way it works is that there are three trimesters and each one has two exams.  The last trimester is just like any other.  The last exam is just over that material covered in the last part of the course. 

On top of that, if the student earned 90's in each trimester up to this point... they "eximir" the last exam, meaning they don't have to take it at all.  That would make sense to me if it was a cumulative final, but it isn't.  It's just another ordinary test that some people get to skip. 

Then, after all of this is over - the students who have below a 70 have to take a sort of cumulative final to prove that they can pass.  Then, there are more steps after that... which I still don't understand.... I think it involves taking another test in February to pass.  I'll let you know if I ever learn about this step.  I hope I don't have to.

Anyway, my point is that everything sort of just gradually or not so gradually ends.... but it doesn't seem to have a definitive end.  We still have a whole week of school after this one and I hear that kids just don't come anymore (like they gradually drop out). Even so, we are supposed to continue teaching.  That is so weird to me!  Why isn't there just a last day for everyone? 

It has been so deeply engrained in my teaching to have culminating projects where learners can use all that they have learned... or to have final exams that show the overall knowledge gained.  I wonder if that's just a different viewpoint than they have here.

How interesting, though, how this idea is reflected in so many different aspects of life.  

Cannibal Chickens

One of the grossest things I've seen at 6:30 in the morning is cannibal chickens.  There is something really disturbing about watching chickens fight over the raw chicken scraps that someone threw out their kitchen window. 

Another gross thing that I see at 6:30 in the morning is the butcher men carrying whole entire pig carcasses over their shoulders as they walk into the carneceria. 

Good thing I don't eat breakfast until after my first class....

"El Pan Se Va"

"El pan llegó!" yells the man riding by as I leave my house at 6:30am.  He gets to the end of the dirt street and immediately turns around.  "El pan se va!!!" he yells as he rides away. 

I laugh out loud all by myself as I tiredly walk to school. 

It sounds so funny when I translate it.  "The bread arrived!"  "The bread leaves!!!"  And the fact that there was so little time that the bread hung out to chat.  It came and went like a missed opportunity that would never present itself again. 

Letting Go of Outcomes

I am practicing letting go of outcomes.

The quickly changing storefronts in this town parallel the quick abandonment of projects without investment in the outcomes. Permanence is not a word I would use to describe life here. 

I don't walk down one street for a week and the next time I do... there are two new stores or restaurants.  Then, the next month those stores and restaurants are gone, only to have new ones take their place. 

So it is with classes or groups.  And I guess that being aware of this cultural climate, I can't blame myself.  Still, it is hard for me to let go.

Why, when we have worked for several months and are almost ready to present our plays, do my kids in Cocal stop coming?  The week before, they committed to seeing the project through to the end... with lots of enthusiasm.  I can't really blame them, either, though.  It is the whole system that fosters these kinds of actions.

The theatre itself changed the date of the performance and wouldn't commit to a new one due to needing to rent out the space for paying functions.  Nobody told me that the school year was ending and that if the students didn't need to take their last exams, they would stop coming.  I asked when the year ended, but this part about not coming anymore was not included in the discussion. 

So this is how the project ends.  Just as quickly and randomly as it began.  No final performance.  No despedidas.

Process over product, right?  I'm telling myself that the process was worth it.  

Difficult Day at Cocal

Yesterday was a difficult day at Cocal - the elementary school where I started a drama program. 

The two special education teachers who help me run the class weren't there, but I went anyway because the play date is coming and I didn't want to loose the time.

I guess the kids didn't feel that time crunch, because they wouldn't do anything.  They had zero energy and kept saying things like, "que pereza" and "que aburrido."  (how lazy and how boring).  Even practicing the one we created last week.... they would have none of it.

So, I told them that if they weren't going to put in any effort there was no need for me being there and I would leave.  So, that's what I did.  I left... but I tried to do it without anger or hard feelings.  I simply told them that we were done for the day and that I would see them next time.

Afterwards, I was beating myself up... thinking thoughts like:
You should be able to handle the class by yourself... you're an experienced teacher.
and.... Why can't you motivate them?
and.... Why doesn't the project of producing their own stories capture their attention?
and... Why is your Spanish still not good enough that they respect you when you talk sternly to them?

And then I remembered...

Just that day, one girl shared that her positive thing to share of the week (her rose) was that she and her two friends were going to pass fifth grade.  Her thorn was that they were the only three.

I couldn't believe that it is more common in this school to stay in your same grade than to move on.

And I thought about how when I got on the little boat to leave back to Quepos, the director was getting off... carrying a door and chicken wire.  I helped him carry the door to the school.  The director..... carrying the door to the school....

I guess my class wasn't that difficult after-all.  We may not have much to present when the show date arrives, but at least the kids show up and are doing something productive/creative with their time.  Who knows what the lasting impacts could be....? 

Also, today I went back just to visit and go to the "special education party"  which in itself is a weird story that you would never see in the US.  It was like nothing ever happened yesterday.  They all hugged me and I gave them just as much love as if they had all won Tony Awards the day before.  After all, they're more important than any play or activity we could be doing.  And today, that was enough. 

World Map Day - the good kind

I wait for my new student on the corner. 

She walks up with her cousin and immediately breaks into a big smile. 
"I remember you from the play.  You came to my school," she beams. 

We walk down the street together and begin our first class at my house.
We play games and the teenage cousin (who dropped out of high school) feels included. 
She puts away her phone and starts asking questions.

"How do you say.....?"

They notice the world map on my wall. 
"Where's the US?" I ask.

They respond that the whole thing is the US. 

"No, this is the world.... the US is here. Where's Costa Rica?"

We find it together. 
"Wow.... so small."

"Where's Panama?"
One indicates all of South America.
"No, that's Panama.  It's small, too."

I think these girls learned more than English in this class. 

Later, when I talked to the mom she told me how her daughter made the family play the English games she had learned in class.  A little teacher. 

And, the adolescent who isn't going to school is enjoying learning....
Strike the imagination, as we learned in Montessori training. 

Traditional school isn't for everyone, but it doesn't mean they can't be excited to learn. 

Commas are Even More Important in Spanish (and in Text Messages)

My friend starts a texting conversation with:

Te tengo una noticia (I have news for you).

I ask her what and she says, No es broma... me voy a vivir a Quepos (It's not a joke... I'm moving to Quepos).

Voy a ser mamá (I'm going to be a mom).

I ask if she's serious, to which sh replies: No no es broma.  Lo más seguro en diciembre (No it's not a joke.  For sure in December).

I told her I wanted to talk with her but couldn't at the moment because I was crossing the border and didn't have much signal. 

She said, Sí claro, y tengo que hablar con usted respecto a eso (Yes, and I need to talk to you about it). 

As you may imagine, I was pretty worried and serious when I called her that night.  I spent the whole bus ride home from Panamá thinking she was pregnant! 

Where the conversation went wrong -

"I'm going to be a mom" should have arrived before "No es broma" and "no es broma" should have had a comma to say "No, it's a joke" instead of "It's not a joke." 

Then, "no no es broma" would mean "no, no.... it's a joke" not "no, it's not a joke." 

What a misunderstanding!

Difficult Conversations - Speak Your Mind, Even if Your Voice Shakes

I remember this quote that my drama teacher had hanging on the wall above her desk when I was 15. 

Difficult conversations are uncomfortable and something I'm working at getting better at.  It's always been scary for me - asserting myself and expressing what I need. 

Here are some examples of difficult conversations I have had recently that I'm proud of: 

1.  I talked with the family I rent from to ask them if they could please hang out somewhere other than the kitchen after 10pm... as it is soundwise, like being inside my bedroom.  There's only screen separating the rooms. 

2.  I called a mother of a student to discuss how her daughter didn't bring the full class payment, when I considered just letting it go. 

3.  I stood up for myself when a student was canceling every class... even though she got mad and stopped taking classes, I felt better about not being disrespected in this way. 

4.  I talked to the manager of the café where I had the allergic reaction.  I almost left when I saw he was in a meeting, but instead I got up the courage to say excuse me and explain to him the Tuna was bad so somebody else wouldn't get sick.  He offered me a free lunch, which I have to admit I ate with a little fear :] 

These all might sound like little things.... but sometimes, little things are big. 

Weirdness of the Week - Episode Interrupted

1.  I walked by a group of homeless men this morning who seemed to be playing a game in a circle.  The game consisted of them hitting each other with their baseball caps... I couldn't guess anymore rules of the game than that.  They were laughing and enjoying themselves, though. 

2.  Two days ago, I was riding the little water taxi over to the school in Cocal where I do my drama group.  As the boat pulled out to make the 2 minute journey across the mangrove a fishing boat floated up.  The women on my boat asked how much the giant fish they just caught was.  They handed it over to her and she held it by the mouth as we continued our journey.  There was no money exchange.... maybe she has an account with them :]   It struck me that this is not something one would see in a normal commute to work. 

3.  I walked by a little neighborhood store - "pulperia" it's called - and there was a cat sitting on the counter where the person passes you your food.  Another rarity.

4.  You'll be watching TV and all of a sudden this stock obituary music comes on and there are a few funeral announcements for the day. I wonder if one pays for it like a commercial for the funeral or if those people are more important in some way...

**** I interrupt this post to tell a story****

I was sitting in a café writing this post when all of a sudden, I had a crazy allergic reaction to tuna.  I was having trouble thinking and my heart was beating fast.  I felt feverish and my head hurt.  I felt anxious, but just thought maybe I was sensitive to coffee that day or that I was getting sick.... I continued writing this blog until the owner of the yoga studio I write for walked up and told me that I looked sunburned and asked me if I was ok.  I looked down at my chest and saw how red I was.   She told me that this had happened to her when she ate tuna one day and that she went to the hospital.  She is a natural healer.... so that seemed extreme. 

I packed up my computer and walked to the Spanish school where the people who work there are like my family.  I walked in, told my friend what was happening and plopped down behind the reception desk.  I felt like I was going to faint.  She sat with me on the floor until another friend came in and sat with me.  She went to the bank and called her boss to ask if she could leave early to take me to the clinic. 

Luckily I started getting better so we didn't go.  I just laid on the floor there behind the desk watching youtube videos with them for a few hours until my friend could go home.  She took me to her house and took care of me for the rest of the night.  :] 

I am so grateful to have such good caring friends here.

I researched, later, what could have happened and it turns out there's this histamine that lives on Tuna that sometimes increases in number after the tuna dies.  Cooking doesn't even kill them.  Needless to say, I don't think I'll be eating tuna for a while - if ever.  It was so scary.  It felt like it was neurologically affecting me.  My cheeks even felt numb and I got really cold and then really hot.  I couldn't process.... but I could still speak Spanish..... hahahah. 

************** Ok, back to the blog - where I left off last Friday ***********

5.  Boys in the Girls bathroom - Apparently this is not as weird as I think it is based on my cultural understandings.  Boys at the high school just walk into the girls bathroom to wash their hands if it's closer.  A boy in the US would never even get close to the girls bathroom!!!!! "Jamás (y queso)" - a joke in Spanish with some of my friends!!!!  Also, the male maintenance guy can clean the bathroom while I'm peeing.... and it's not weird at all.  I remember males not even entering a bathroom to clean if anybody at all was in there back home. 

6.   I has been Christmas since the beginning of October.  Like I said before, after September 15th - independence day - there's no holiday to hinder the coming of Christmas.... so, let it go!!! 

A book store in San Jose on October 11th

The office of the HS

The cleaning lady at the HS :]  So cute!

7.  This is not as weird as it is lovely and sweet.  The 11th graders - seniors - at the high school today started their really important exams (bachillerato).  Before they started, the whole school and all of the teachers gathered on the soccer court to wish them well.  They stood in a circle and prayed and said how they were good leaders.  After, everyone hugged them.  It was moving to see this sense of community and support for a HS exam.  I'm glad I got to see that.  

Until the next weirdness...... :] 

The Day "Hola" Gave Me Away

Some days it just feels like my Spanish is so bad.  My tongue gets tied and I stutter.  Words come out with the wrong vowel sounds and it's like I never learned the basic rules of grammar.... verbs like gustar throw me off and I forget whether the most common words I use day to day are feminine or masculine.

The longer I am here, the more frustrating this feels.  Why do I have lapses like this?

This afternoon, I was just walking down the street and an obnoxious young man yelled "hola" at me in a cat calling manner out of a store front.  I said "hola" back.  Then, he retorted - "oh.... hellllooooooo."

Was my "hola" really that bad that he knew to switch to English?  

Uhhh.  One of those days. 

Bulla

Bulla = noise.  Right now it is the bane of my existence.  I know that sounds extreme, but I have been tolerating the shrieking and antics of the 20 something year old brothers that live in the house in front of me for a while now.  After being woken up in the middle of the night almost every day to them charging at each other, knocking into walls, giggling.... I have had about all I can take.

Since I have moved to Costa Rica I have tolerated:

A dog that would howl all night at anyone who would pass the house.... or I don't even know what he was barking at.
The construction of a building 10 meters from my window every morning from 6am on (Saturday, too).... that included a lot of metal grinding.
Semi Trucks, motor bikes and cars without mufflers zooming past my window ridiculously fast and extremely loud.
Fireworks for the entire two months that are Christmas here...
And now... 20 something year old brothers who act like imbeciles.

I'm tired :[

But, in looking for a new place to live today I learned something funny.  I called this woman on the phone and she told me her house is after "el ultimo muerto" - the last dead person.... I was like, ok... and acted like I knew what she was talking about.  I knew there must be something I was missing.

As soon as I got off the phone I texted a friend who laughed and explained to me that this was a speed bump.  And imagine me.... walking around a neighborhood looking for a dead person!  jajajaja

Always learning new things...

Decepcionada

Decepcionada - Dissappointed.... 

The word decepcionada sounds so much better to me, though.  It really captures the feeling of almost being deceived by a situation and the hurt that comes from that.

It was the only word I could think of after I showed up to the rehearsal for my improv group... and was the only one there.

I don't understand why in a country where there is a whole RAINY SEASON, why rain is an excuse to not go somewhere important.   Also, why do some people not have umbrellas?  It's not a surprise that it is going to rain..... And it's not that they don't have the money.... Some things I don't think I'll ever understand.  Also, why people are always out of minutes to call or text you back... and how that is also a valid excuse. 

This is the note that I wrote them later than night on FB:

Chicos, tengo que decirles que estoy decepcionada que absolutamente nadie llegó hoy. Yo sé que estaba lloviendo y que estan en examenes y todo eso.... pero tampoco me dijeron que no podian venir. Solo Anebis me respondió asi - quiero agradecerle por eso.
Para mi, no me importa el show - que presentamos o no.... lo que me molesta es la falta de compromiso del grupo y la falta de respecto de mi tiempo. Si decimos que vamos a hacer algo, hay que hacerlo. Hemos trabajado mucho estos meses y estamos listos para presentar.
Obviamente no vamos a presentar mañana. Por su puesto todos estan invitados a ayudar con la obra mañana como siempre. El sabado hablamos del futuro de este grupo.

I'm more over it now and it must not have been meant to be.  "Dios no lo quiso."  I know that improv has benefits whether or not there is ever an audience involved.  And, at least I didn't have to hike through the mountains for 2 hours or over a rickety bridge to get there.  All I had to do was get my feet wet in the rain.  

The Yoga Studio I Write For

Check out the article I wrote for the yoga studio :]



http://www.spaholis.com/aerial-yoga-works-defying-gravity-spa-holis-costa-rica/

Performing with Less and Less Rehearsals - Children's Day and the Anti Drug Campaign

Who says you need to rehearse to be in a play?  JAJAJAJA!  (that's laughing in Spanish).







For Children's Day on September 9th, the theatre went on tour to perform "El Cemeterio de los Libros Olvidados."  We went to two elementary schools.  So, now I can say I have acted in an International Children's Theatre Tour, right?

The funny part is that I only had one rehearsal before performing.  I rehearsed with my friend, Ramona,... who helped me to summarize the meaning of chunks of lines so that I could improv within the chunks.  Then, I rehearsed for like 10 minutes with the other actor, Alexis.

I was still learning my lines in the van on the way to the school, but somehow I did it!  And the kids had so much fun :]  I just played big, interacted with the audience, and was as silly as possible.  Success.  Definitely improvising a script in Spanish was a big "reto."

Then, it got even crazier.  I showed up to an anti-drug event at a school where the vice president of Costa Rica had even come to talk.... and the theatre wanted me to join in the play they were about to perform.  No rehearsal!!!! I mean, I only had like 3 lines, but still.  We didn't end up performing, though, because one of the actors had to go to work because the event was taking so long.  That in itself is odd to me; they rehearsed for like two weeks only to not perform at the event.  No big deal.





We did perform that play, though, the next weekend for PANI (the child protective services).  I did perform then, still without rehearsing.

These experiences will definitely go on the list of things I never thought I would do.

Also, I think it's fun that Children's Day means a big party at school with dancing and a trampoline.  Note the trampoline in the back.  Both schools we went to had rented one for the day. 

Weirdness of the Month - Crocodile Edition

1.  So, I thought it was weird last year when I saw an iguana crossing the road.  That doesn't come close to what wanted to cross the road last week in Quepos.  And this was right in front of the elementary school!

2.  I got into a collectivo last week (a collectivo is an unofficial taxi - basically anyone can be a collectivo) and as I got in, the woman in the back seat yelled to the man in the passenger seat, "We're a taxi now.... respect!" That was the only thing that was said the whole way into town.  You could cut the tension with a knife.  I wonder if the driver just picked me up to avoid whatever argument the family was having.

3.  Homeless people can be really friendly here.  Last night, I had just bought a bag of platano chips and opened them as I walked by a man sitting on the sidewalk.  He looked up at me and asked me for one chip.  I handed him one and he looked back at me and said, "muchas gracias... muy amable!" He was genuinely happy for the single chip.  I remember one time I tried to give a whole subway sandwich to a homeless man in downtown Tucson and he threw it on the ground angrily.  Another homeless man here says hello to me every time I walk by and tells me I'm the most beautiful thing he's seen all day.  It's not in a creepy way, either.  He actually just sounds like he's saying something nice.  Whatever it is I like it better than the kissy sounds some guys make as they drive by or the sounds they make that sound like their calling over a cat.  I guess they're literally "cat calling."

4.  I ran into one of my improv students at the independence parade a few weeks ago and she was carrying around "baby pienselo."  It was like baby-think-it-over had followed me all the way from the middle school.  I even got to hold it for her while she had to take care of her real little brother.  Weird.

5.  I've been noticing that Spanish has different onomatopoeias than English does and that amuses me. For example:

We say "knock knock"; they say "toc toc." "Toc toc, who's there?"  :] 
We say "ding dong"; they say "zum zum."
We say "Bam!"  They say "Zas!"
Chickens who speak English say "peep peep," but chickens who speak Spanish say, "pio pio." 
I say "yaayyyy!"  They laugh at me. 
They say "Ay!!!!" and guys make weird screaching wooping sounds to each other.... I'm still not really sure what emotion it conveys but it happens in the house I rent from late at night and drives me crazy.

How odd that sounds seemingly not based in a language are still specific to that language.  I mean, a knock is not a word.... it's a sound.  And chickens don't speak English.  I wonder why it's this way.

A Day in Review - a variation on weirdness of the week

Some days here are still just so odd that when I look back on them I laugh in appreciation for all the weirdness.  Maybe even the weirdest part is that it often takes until the moment I reflect on the day to realize just how weird it was.

I sleep through my alarm even though it has been going off for an hour.  My friend calls to see if I'm coming to work and I get to the high school within 15 minutes to be only 5 minutes late.  While the students make fun of me for being late, they almost seem happy to see that I make mistakes and were kinder the rest of the class.  That was unexpected.  In fact, it seems we finally have some sort of a positive relationship.  We all let things go easier and their work ethic has improved.  They also act like they trust me more.  It has been a 7 month process.

I climb up a hill to a new student's house and we talk for about a half hour so I can see her level of English.  After the mini-class, she tells me she really likes me and then out of nowhere she says, "I want to name my next child after you."  I didn't tell her that nobody here can pronounce my name and that I've started introducing myself as Mori because it's easier.

I walk past a storefront that is a room of slot machines and a man is playing slots.  He has set his baby on the adjacent machine.  I'm serious.  A baby that looks as though it can barely sit on its own is sitting on a slot machine.  That's like the time I walked by the gym and saw a baby sitting in the middle of the boxing ring while people boxed all around it.

Speaking of babies in odd places... I have seen babies in front bike baskets, babies carried like a sack of rice under the arm of a bike rider, and the most agile - a dad riding a bike with his toddler on his shoulders... while holding an umbrella so they would stay dry during the thunderstorm.  Picture that.  I can't help but juxtapose these scenes with the use of car seats and safety measures taken in the US.

Then, I have two more private classes where a series of "have you ever" questions leads into an hour long discussion of the three fights this tiny, sweet, female student has been in.  She recounts in very good detail why the fights started and what happened.  The vocabulary for the day - fight, hit, scratch, drag, choke, defend, jump on, punch, bully, beat up....  Very important words, right?  

My last student of the day tells me things like "I think I will live forever because I laugh a lot" and  "When I was child I thought my gift was dancing.  It wasn't.  Then, when I was older, I thought my gift was singing.  I heard myself.  It wasn't.  Now, my gift is writing.  I want to be a famous writer.  I don't know why I write like a boy. I think I write boy characters because boys are complicated, but the woman is more complicated.  I don't understand the woman.  My boyfriend says he knows me but he can't know me because I don't even really know me." She is 16 years old.

This student and one other 9 year old student have been with me for over a year.  They were the first two to call me when I started advertising in August 2013.  They were the ones that I had to tell things like, "Well I usually...." when I had really never done it before! I showed up so nervous thinking, Well, here we go..... I hope I know how to do this or can figure it out as we go..  That's just what we did - figured it out one lesson at a time.  The progress they have made and the trust we have built is incredible.   The nine year old started with the alphabet and now can say things like, "Can a baby fly?  No, it can't."  "I have brown hair.  Moriah has brown hair.  Jeremy has a car, but it is a little toy car."  That might not sound like much, but she used to look at me like I was an alien when I asked her something like "How are you?" At some early points, it seemed as though she was not retaining or progressing at all.  Suddenly, she started producing language.  Now, she understands much of what  I say and always helps me invent new English games to play.  We laugh a lot.  Sometimes when I am in class with these students it hits me how lucky I am to have this job where I spend time one-on-one with interesting, creative people like this.

Even the Taxis Can't Find my House

While I live on a street without an entrance for cars... just a decrepit sidewalk, I thought at least the taxis would know where it was.  Nope.  It was pouring rain as it does almost every night.  The kind of rain that as soon as you step out into it, even with an umbrella, you may as well have just emerged from the ocean. 

So, in an attempt to arrive at my corporate English class somewhat dry and presentable, I called a taxi.  When I gave the dispatcher my address, he only half listened and insisted that he knew where it was - giving completely different landmarks in his direction. 

The taxi never came.  I called again to see what had happened and he said I wasn't there when the car arrived.  That's because it wasn't even my neighborhood!

I explained again and he acted like I was incompetent and told me that wasn't my address that I had said. 

He insisted it was a different address and the process repeated. 

No taxi.

At this point, my class was starting so I walked the 100 meters down the sidewalk to a landmark that taxis would understand.  I called a different taxi and went on to class. 

In the process I still managed to get soaked.  I guess that's what happens when your neighbors are literally chickens. 

Cocal and the Baby Food Robber

Tiny human footprints were found on the wall of the school kitchen in the Cocal School that I teach drama at.  All of the rice and beans were stolen.  The only way someone could have gotten in would be by being the size of a toddler and squeezing through the narrow spaces between the bars in the windows.  Having your toddler steal food from the elementary school... what an illustration of the poverty in this area. 

You can see an example of the houses in the area behind the kids

Selling Single Items

I just think it is funny that while the US super sizes things and sells in bulk, this morning I saw a kid at the store buy one pencil and one piece of gum.

Things I have seen sold as single items that make me laugh:

a piece of gum
a pencil
a pen
a cigarette
a sample size of shampoo or conditioner (like the little packets attached to advertisements you get in the mail)
a single pill (of any kind - like ibuprofen for example)

I'm sure there are many more but this is all I can think of for now. 

Just Your Normal Latin American Chaos...

I "started" another theatre group at a second school (about a half hour bus ride from town). 

The first day I went to teach, they were having a science fair - so I just watched that and then met the teachers when it ended.  They all seemed excited to have me there and seemed eager to participate.  I thought, well, I guess it's pretty normal to be randomly having a science fair without telling me. 

Then, this week I went to "start" the group for real.  When I got there, however, there was no school and all of the kids were running around decorating for the Mother's Day dinner they were to have that evening.  The director greeted me and told me that we were still going to do my class and that he would call the kids over.  I asked him if we had a list of participants and he told me that we didn't, yet.  I asked him where the teachers were that were supposed to be helping and he told me they were cooking for the dinner. 

He made the announcement that my class was starting and about 25 kids ran into the room, cell phones in hand, screeching, and even carrying each other.  After we started with name games, about 10 more kids wandered in through the open door.  All the rest of the kids stood outside the barred windows as spectators to what we were doing.  I can only imagine that this made the participants more nervous; maybe this is why they were so resistant to doing anything I had planned. 

Names and gestures - forget about it.  I could barely get them to say their names.  Pass the ball in a sequence to learn names... forget about it.  Kids wandered in and out of the circle (some saying they were being called by the office, but I don't know) making it impossible to keep a pattern.  "If you like mountains go to this side of the room... If you like the beach, go to this side..."  Also impossible.  They all chose the same option no matter what it was.  Only one girl seemed to think for herself.  Major mob mentality? 

We tried playing some improv games like "collectivo" and anyone who was not in the scene acted like they were on the playground.  No matter what I tried, they just didn't seem to want to be there... and boy did I try several different tactics of classroom management.  Eventually, I got so sick of them taking their cell phones off the table I had made them leave the phones on.... the wandering in and out of the room like it was a room in a party you came to socialize in.... that I told them we were done for the day. 

I wanted to talk with the director about what we needed to set in place for next time so that the situation was workable, but he had left to run errands. 

After it was all over, I stood on the side of the highway in the middle of a palm plantation... waiting for any form of transportation to pass by to take me back to town, thinking that I never wanted to go back to this chaos.  Maybe, though, it's a good opportunity to set up some structure and try again?  We'll see. 

I guess every foreign teacher in a situation like this one needs to experience this chaos at least once.... right?  As my friend Sam says, I think this was a "World Map" kind of teaching day. 

Homesick for Change - Traveling through a Wormhole

Being in another country for a long time is a weird thing.  I didn't move here with the intention of staying forever so, unlike a normal move, I guess I still see Tucson and my old life there as home.  In reality, however, I don't know that it is.

The second school year at the middle school has started.  None of my students are there anymore.
Several of my good friends have moved away while I've been gone.
And when I look at facebook.... it seems like, daily, good friends are getting engaged, married, and having babies.

I feel like I'm in this sort of vortex where I went into a parallel universe  Or like I went through a worm hole like in the movie, Contact  where the time in space would move a lot slower for her than it would on earth... causing her to return to a very different reality.  It's like my old life went on pause (for me) and now I have such different experiences.  The part that strikes me from time to time, is that one day I will shift my universe again and will see that life wasn't actually on pause just because I walked away from the TV.  It was actually a play, that continued on and changed whether I was there or not.

I guess that's what they call part of reverse culture shock - integrating yourself back into your "old" life..... although, it will never really be the same.  But then again, nothing ever is.

I still feel the longing, though, to be a part of it all.  I am sooooo fortunate to have this opportunity to do what I am doing.  Does that mean, though, that I will miss this life stage of being in weddings, helping raise babies, attending 10 year HS reunions?  These normal rights of passage of being a young adult will not be a part of my experience.  I guess I can't be everywhere at once.... but I can spend one morning wanting to be. 

Cocal - My Little Theatre Group

I have started going to an elementary school once a week to start a theatre group.

Here are some pictures:

The only way to get there is by a little boat.
 It only costs like 25 cents to get across the water from the town of Quepos.

The community is super poor and the houses are basically shacks that people have set up. 
They don't actually own them because it is public land.
 I think the only thing that is actually legally there is the school. 

Our first day :]  They were very excited. 

I had them make frozen pictures to represent their community.  In this one, they are surfing.

This is my favorite - They are riding in a boat... and there is a shark, of course. 

Costa Rica Facts - From Matador Network

I knew most of these, but some were new to me.  

1. Costa Ricans call themselves ticos (males) and ticas(females).
2. It’s not a big deal to see someone walking around with a machete. Although it’s more common in the countryside, ticos use machetes for everything and often keep one on them. They’re considered the Costa Rican equivalent of duct tape.
3. Costa Rica is only slightly smaller than Lake Michigan, and has 801 miles of coastline.
4. Ticos often refer to their significant others as their“media naranja," which means “the other half of their orange.”
5. Costa Rica’s president, Luis Guillermo Solís, won the 2014 election with over 77% of the vote. This was the largest margin ever recorded for a free election in Costa Rica. Previously, Costa Rica’s president was Laura Chinchilla, Costa Rica’s first female president and sixth female elected for president of a Latin American country.
6. Costa Rica has more than 121 volcanic formations, with seven of them being active. Poás Volcano has the second widest crater in the world, and Arenal is one of the ten most active volcanoes in the world.
7. The country is host to more than 5% of the world’s biodiversity. Even though its landmass only takes up .03% of the planet’s surface, more than 10% of the world’s butterflies live here — there are about 750,000 species of insects that live in Costa Rica, and 20,000 various kinds of spiders.
8. Costa Rica has no standing army. They abolished the army in 1948 after their last civil war ended.
9. Costa Rican women don’t take their husband’s last name, and instead use their full maiden name for life. Children take their father’s name but add their mother’s maiden name to their full name.
10. Instead of saying a woman “had a baby,” ticos say “ella dio a luz," meaning, “she gave light.”
11. Every Costa Rican radio station plays the national anthem every morning at 7am.
12. Until a few years ago, wearing shorts was a sign of disrespect, and government buildings wouldn’t allow visitors to enter unless they were wearing long pants.
13. Pedestrians are called “targets" and speed bumps are called “son muertos” — in English, “(they are) dead people.”
14. Costa Rica is considered one of the most valued environmental destinations in the world. There are over 100 protected areas to visit, and 25% of the country has protected forests and reserves.
15. Ice cream flavors in Costa Rica are interesting and sometimes slightly weird. Flavors include coconut, goat cheese, wild blackberry, peanut, sour cream, chipotle blueberry, chocolate almond, and more.
16. You could easily call Costa Rica the unofficial hummingbird capital. The country is home to over 52 species of hummingbird.
17. Pura Vida is a happy, feel-good expression. It is used regularly by the locals when asked how they are or in passing to say hello or goodbye.
18. Costa Rica has an exceptionally high life expectancy of 79, one of the highest in the world. It receives international praise for its modern healthcare system, where it’s ranked 36th in the world by the World Health Organization (WHO). The Nicoya Peninsula is one of the world’s seven Blue Zones, a place where people live longer and happier lives, and has a high concentration of people over age 100.
19. There are usually no street names or addresses, so people simply get accustomed to giving directions via landmarks. When giving someone a home address, ticos usually say something like, “It’s the blue house just south of where the cow is tied up,” or “It’s 500 meters north of the big tree.”
20. Mae is the Costa Rican slang term for “dude," and is used regularly in conversation with young people.
21. Costa Rica has a 96% literacy rate. In rural areas of the country where ticos are very poor and don’t have access to school, classes are taught on air over a national radio station.

Read more: http://matadornetwork.com/abroad/21-things-might-know-costa-rica/#ixzz3A2yu2T32

How Parties End

Random observation of the day...

I have noticed this on several occasions: parties end and disperse super quickly.  One moment, the party is happening and I have no idea it is nearing the end.  The next moment, everyone is up and putting away chairs... clearing off table cloths.  Then, after disassembling the party like a swarm of ants, they're gone. 

I'm left sitting, wondering what signal I missed signifying that the party had ended.  No long goodbyes in this culture.  No hanging around, chatting.  A quick kiss and a thank you and you're off. 

Apparently, one "obvious" marker - as I was told today - is that after the piñata, the party is over.  That is how everyone except me knows. 


I find it hilarious that I can be so clueless with unspoken cultural norms.  


The party, though, was a lot of fun and I got to see where one of my friends grew up in the "campo" (countryside) about an hour outside of Quepos.  I spent the day with her and her adorable family, celebrating her nephew's first birthday. I remember when he was born last year! 

Translations are Funny

Google Translate could have done better... I have no idea what it is trying to say.

This sign is at a fancy hotel.  The owner is from the US.  How did this happen?

Microwaves and Fire Pits

When I was walking home from school the other day I walked by a house on one of the dirt roads.  This house doesn't have windows, just open squares in the wall.  It has some sort of a door, but not a proper one.  The family was standing outside, cooking breakfast over a fire.  They were staring at me, but as soon as I said, "Buenas!" they responded with huge smiles and enthusiastic greetings of "Buenas!" I find that that little greeting brings light to most awkward encounters on the street :]  It is as if I am reaching out and saying, I come in peace... I am happy to see you... I'm not a scary Gringa. 

Of course I have walked by houses like this many times over the past year, but this time I thought about how disparate the scene is; one house on the street can have a microwave and the family in the next house cooks over a fire.  

Then, there's the other layer... of how people don't seem to think there is anything wrong with that.  I have not seen judgment against the types of neighbors that cook outside and don't have windows.  In fact, my neighbors are some of them... and they love that I help feed their chickens with my food scraps.  I feel like in my town back home, there is a rich side of town and a poor side of town; the people generally don't want them to mix.  The rich people stay away from the other side of town because it is "dangerous" and those houses even have windows! 

Maybe it is because the switch from fire pits to microwaves is so recent in the culture that it is not too weird and therefore, more accepted.  Even my friends that live in modern houses, here in town... when we go visit their families, they cook outside on the fire.  

It fascinates me how socioeconomic classes seem to operate here in this small town.  Maybe there are judgments that I don't see, but from what I have perceived... poverty seems to be a lot less looked down on here by the more well off.  I wonder why that is.  Even in the schools, they talk about not judging children of different economic statuses.  But, then again - I guess I don't interact much with anyone that wealthy.  It seems like in San Jose, the classes are much more distinct and separate. 

One thing I do know.... food tastes really good when cooked outside on the fire :]  So, I am grateful that this method of cooking still exists.  Plus, I'm sure it is much healthier for you than a microwave!  

A Culture That Cultivates Story Tellers

Today, I was honored to be a judge at the Fine Arts Festival (FEA - Festival Estudiantil de los Artes); my two friends and I were sent by the theatre as representatives.  Each school and high school in Costa Rica holds their own festival at this time of year.  The students qualify at their local levels and then eventually go on to compete at a national level in San Jose.

There are many categories, ranging from Story Telling of Traditional Costa Rican Tales to Photography.  There was even a boy who painted himself silver and froze as a statue in various poses as music played.

Even a puppet show about bullying and tolerance :]

Mis Compañeros del Teatro Copaza

One of the things that really struck me as I was watching these young children perform is that it is clear to me that this country cultivates story tellers.  Even the small children seem to have gifts of sharing tales with such dynamic expression that I haven't seen before in all my days doing drama with kids.  I wonder if this is one of the reasons my beginning improvisers don't seem to start out as such beginners.  It is already inside of them to entertain: to tell funny stories about what happened when they were at the hospital, or in a collectivo... with all the different voices and characters and everything.  I know I definitely have friends here with this gift. Come to think of it, people I talk to on the bus tell me stories with this excitement.  No wonder I feel at home when story swapping with Ticos :]  

Even the rubrics we used as judges impressed me.  It was as if a drama teacher wrote them.  They had all the necessary categories for critiquing a performance.  It even had a section for dramaturgy, which  I thought was odd.  And this was a form given out by the Ministry of Public Education.  How organized is it to have a festival like this in every school!?  The only thing similar that I have seen in the US has been a festival we created at the University for high schools to attend.  That was put on by an outside entity... I can't imagine trying to make the festival happen within every school.

And it's interesting to me because, here, they don't often have drama classes (if at all) ... but somehow it seems to be built in.  I guess they do a lot of skits and such in their regular classes?  Some of the teachers came up to us afterwards and begged my friends and I from the theatre to give them classes on how to teach drama because they don't know how.

Which brings me to another announcement:

This week, I will be realizing more of my dream of being here by starting a drama class at a school in the poorest area around Quepos.  It is called Cocal.  I'm really excited to work with these kids over the next few months and will let you know how it is going.  

My work there is part of a project that the theatre is starting, called "Teatro en la Comunidad."  The goal is to get more dramatic arts in the schools and through that, to help students who are at risk choose productive activities and of course - develop so many skills.  :]

Oh, and I was telling someone the other day how at the end of the day, I'm often surprised at what happened ... because much of it is not planned when I wake up in the morning.  I'm also surprised at what people give me the opportunity to do or of what I get put in charge of.  Judging for this festival was one of those experiences.  I guess sometimes it takes others assuming you have the abilities to make you realize that in fact, they were right :]  You are qualified.  Well, except in "traditional Costa Rican dance," which they probably realized and didn't have me judge ;]  jajajaja. 

This is the traditional dance I wasn't expected to judge ;]

The paper mache dog that made me laugh.  It looks like all dogs here.... hot!

Words Words Words

My neverending quest to understand words continues...

Today, I think my friend and I figured out English equivalents for some words and phrases that have eluded me for some time. 

Regañar - to chew someone out. 
Me da pereza - I don't feel like it. 

"Me da pereza" literally means, it gives me lazyness.  I always thought that was so weird that people say so often that they are not doing something because it gives them lazyness.  In the culture of the US, laziness is such a character flaw that people don't claim it in conversation:

Teacher: Move to your assigned seat.
Student: No, I'm lazy.

or

I want to go to the party, but I'm lazy.


But you do hear: I want to go to the party, but I don't feel like it. 
 So... as I write my own mental dictionary....
That is how I've decided to interpret that phrase. 

The Little Nuances of Language and the Not-So-Little Missunderstandings They Can Create

Personal sense of identity becomes a very interesting thing when assimilating into a new culture.  It is easy to start judging who you are... trying to fit into the norms around you.  

The theme of this week is misunderstandings: both in culture and in language.  One event that is culturally different can lead to judgment (or perceived judgment - whether or not the judgement even happened on either side) and a lot of hurt.  The feelings become even more intensified when you are trying to have a sense of belonging in a different culture than the one you come from and then feel rejected... Like when someone stops trying to explain why something happened and even though they may not say it, their subtext says: You will never understand because you're not from here.

But, they are right - I suppose.  The reality is: I am NOT from here.  And no matter what  I do or how much I learn, I will NEVER be from here. I will Never know all the songs parents sing to their children as they fall asleep at night, the inside jokes based on the history of the country, the reason why it would be UNTHINKABLE to go to school without the ability to shower in the morning (equivalent to as if you were to walk outside naked).  And I am realizing that I have to be OK with that. I'm not FROM here but I AM here. 

I can be a cultural explorer, in a sense.  A scientist, fascinated by the many differences and similarities between us.  And through the journey, remember to appreciate who I am and where I've come from.  I am not lacking because I don't know all about this culture... On the contrary, it is quite the opposite; I am blessed to be able to have all of my own cultural heritage plus the experiences of another. 


It's almost as if the more fluent in Spanish I become, the more difficult some aspects of communication get. 

One would think that being more fluent in a language can only be a positive thing, right?  Well, mostly it is positive and the benefits are far greater than the costs.  I can navigate doctor's offices, listen to science fair presentations and ask pertinent questions, judge a student theatre festival... all of these activities are only possible with a high proficiency in a language.  Yet, it is shocking how one misread preposition can lead to the misunderstanding of an entire idea and a wrong choice of a words in a discussion between friends can lead to some pretty hurt feelings. 

In the high school, there is a sign that reads, "Alza su voz, no el nivel del mar."  For months, I had been reading the sign with an "al" instead of an "el."  This lead me to believe that the sign was saying "Raise your voice, but not to the same level as the sea."  I thought this was some profound statement about standing up for yourself but with more of a pacifistic stance... not rough like the waves.  I asked a student about it the other day, wanting more context and he laughed when I explained my thoughts.  All it was really saying was "Raise your voice, not the sea level" - a simple statement about climate change.  All because I thought the "the" was a "to the."  This is just one example of how little things can cause big differences. 

I also learned, last night, that the words for disagree and fight are two very different things. So, when someone says, "I don't want to fight with you" it is not similar to "I don't want to argue with you."  These statements sound pretty interchangeable to me in English, but I no longer think they are in Spanish.  And some words... I think I know how to use them, but even though I look them up in the dictionary... they still don't seem to have English equivalents.  For example: Regañar.... I've heard it used as "My father me regañó when I didn't do my homework" or "don't regañar me."  So, I think it means like to be upset with someone and talk sternly to them, but none of that is in the dictionary.  And the word for fight - "pelear" is the same as "regañar" in the dictionary (to quarrel), but in real life it does not seem the same AT ALL.  And then, there's the Costa Rican word "plato" that means to discuss in a way of disagreeing, but of course THAT'S not in the dictionary at all! 

Also, how we say "I know" in English as a way of saying "yes, I hear you" or "me too" ... that does not translate when you say it in Spanish.  It just sounds arrogant.  Like when someone says they miss you and you respond with "I know," it does not mean "I miss you too... I am in agreement with how you feel."  It actually means, something like "I know, of course you miss me" or "I'm so smart I already know everything." What you really need to say to express this sentiment is the equivalent of "equal." 

The hardest part of all this is that, because I sound pretty "fluent" in the language, people assume I know what I am saying.  For that reason, one poorly chosen word can have a huge affect on a conversation and an entire interaction.  Whereas before, people just assumed I didn't know what I was saying and didn't take much of what I said seriously at all... now, they seem to be convinced I totally know what I am saying and have no way of knowing that I don't fully understand the appropriate meaning of one word.  This is how the more fluent in Spanish I become, the more difficult some aspects of communication get. 

On the other hand, though, I have learned a very important lesson from all this, and that is: to work more at listening to people without thinking I know what they're going to say.  Because, maybe I have a habit of using the "I know" statement too much. In places it doesn't belong. Because really... I don't know what someone is feeling or what they want to share with me.  Maybe this "I know" colloquialism gets in the way of the actual listening.   The actual listening that I value so greatly. 

Some language lessons, I have learned the hard way.  And those lessons, I don't think I'll ever need to repeat.