The MOST RIDICULOUS Job Interview Ever

Ok, knock on wood... but I definitely just went to the most ridiculous job interview I have ever been to... and I would dare to say the most ridiculous one I might ever go to. 

First of all, the lady that I had been emailing with - who is the owner of this private elementary/HS here in CR (and she is not Costa Rican) - decided just from me sending my resume... that I had already accepted the job.  Mind you, she said we'd talk about what grade I would teach...etc when I came.  Well, she had decided that I was to teach 4th grade everything... 7th grade English once a week... and somewhere in there: drama.  When she started talking to me she was acting like she was giving me an orientation and saying things like "you have 8 kids in this class and here are the books... just make sure you do a few pages a day and give homework or whatever. You don't have to plan anything... just do the books with them.  If they fail their parents will be mad and blame us so let them do retests...."  I actually had to stop her and say, "Wait.  What position are you looking to hire me for?"  She seemed surprised that she would have to explain that.

Instead of asking me any normal questions like about my teaching experience or philosophy she just told me about writing my bio for the parents and how we have to make the parents happy because they are paying a lot of money.  "You can't use any Spanish in the classroom because the parents are paying a lot of money."  "We don't accept kids with ADD or any learning challenges because they take up too much time and the parents pay a lot." 

The answers to any of my questions seemed like they were made up on the spot.  For example, when I asked about the pay she said $850/month (which I don't understand if the parents are paying so much).  I asked her if there was room for a raise and she thought for a moment and said, "hmmm... well, if they like you we can give you $900 or if you do drama with them we can raise it a little."  When I asked if that would happen at a specific time or not she said, "whenever they say that they like you."   When I asked her how many teachers she had, she replied - "um.... like 10 or 15."  Are you serious, you don't even know how many teachers you have?  School starts in ONE WEEK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

When I told her that I would prefer to teach HS because I love adolescents, she stopped to think for a moment.  Then she seemed distressed and said she would have to think.  After about 10 seconds she said sure.... and I could sometimes teach the elementary too.  Did she not have a HS teacher either?  Was there no schedule or organization to this school?  My head almost exploded.  I am pretty sure that the public schools here are more organized than this. Also, when I tried to tell her about my previous teaching experience she just interrupted me and moved on. 

Finally, I extracted myself from this meeting by saying that I had concerns about how soon school was starting and that I didn't have a place to live or anything.  This place is in the middle of nowhere in this industrial district outside of the "rich part of Costa Rica."  She started with a guilt trip complaining, "well, I guess they won't have theatre this year."  Yep.  There is no way I will ever be going back to that place.  You couldn't get me to teach there if you tripled the salary. 

*Please don't take this story as a snapshot of Costa Rican schools.... they have to be better than this.  I just don't understand how this place exists. 

I didn't even explain, yet, the process that was getting to this interview. I got on a bus in Barva at 8:30 to go to Heredia.  When we got close to Heredia, I asked a guy on the bus where to catch the one to San Jose.  I always try to find a guide on the bus who will help me make it to the next connection :]  Then, as the bus was pulling away... I jumped on.  In San Jose, I waited 40 min for the bus to the small rural place outside of Escazu.  We went all through Escazu until I was the last person on the bus.  I had told the driver where I was intending to go and from what I understood - he said he would take me there.  He randomly stopped and started talking to this young guy out of the door to the bus.  He told me that he would show me where to go.  I got off and confirmed with the guy that he knew where he was going.  He said bye to his girlfriend and began walking me down the freeway.  His girlfriend told me not to be afraid.  I wasn't, but I guess that was nice of her.  Well, it turned out that he walked me 1km in the wrong direction... to the local neighborhood school.  At that point, the lady was calling me because I was late.  It was already 11:00.  She told me to walk 2 km in the other direction to find the school.  Many people are willing to be guides and act like they know exactly where you are going - even when you say something like "1 km North" of the landmark where you are.  Well, at least they want to be helpful.  Sometimes I wish they would just say they didn't know.